CHRISTMAS PRESENCE

 

If you've been paying attention, yes, this is a repost. But I can claim it as new because I fixed a spelling mistake. And added this photo. Which I've only used once before. Besides it's creeping up on Christmas and the sentiments here are timeless, universal, and largely based on greed. Perfect.

This year, why not give the gift that puzzles: ALIAS POOR YORICK here at http://www.funnycomedyjokes.blogspot.com/

Yes, it's ALIAS POOR YORICK the comedy blog that's so good, from next year we're calling it a comedy blogue.

ALIAS POOR YORICK is guaranteed to cure dyspepsia, dyslexia, and dystopia. It will make you taller, better-looking, and 23% more capable of understanding French, Italian and in fact most of the romance languages.ALIAS POOR YORICK is guaranteed to save marriages, businesses, and some small countries from ruin. It will make most small cars run better, and make large cars feel less guilty about their carbon footprint. Your children will perform better at school and love you more. (NOT A CORE PROMISE)

So do it now, folks: simply post the link above to ten of your closest friends. They will thank you for it, and we'll be a bit chuffed and all.

Act now. Avoid unpleasantness. The subscription dept here at APY is getting a bit insistent on upping our numbers. If we don't see a serious increase, there will be poetry. Yes, there, I've said it - poetry. Very serious poetry I wrote when I was twelve. Believe me, no-one wants this. These are very serious poems about death written by a twelve-year-old. Save yourselves. There's one about a fire dying, there's one about an old man dying. There's one about a tree. It's already dead. Really, it will be ugly. Stop this madness and post that link now.

Don't trifle with me, people. You're dealing with a man who once applied for planning permission to build a placebo in his backyard.