YOUR CALL IS IMPORTANT TO US
Thank you for calling Alias Poor Yorick, proud purveyor of ethically-sourced single-origin comedy. Please hold the line. Your call is important to us, as you can tell by the care and compassion that has gone into selecting our hold music. Today you have the very great privilege of listening to the Ukraine Women's Theremin Ensemble covering Billy Ray Cyrus' "Achy Breaky Heart". No don't thank us, we can feel the love from here. Again, your call is important to us. If you wish to speak to someone who will assure you that absolutely everything is fine, despite enormous amounts of evidence to the contrary, please press 1 If you wish to make inquiries about how many comedy writers it takes to change a light-bulb, press 2 ( it's three actually, one to change the light-bulb, one to drive to the bottle-shop for more beer, and one to kill anybody who says "This is supposed to be funny, right ?") Thank you for calling. Your call is important to us. Don...