ALIAS POOR YORICK

Late Braking News Action being taken today by the Australian Writers of Comedy Wackiness And Risible Drivel (AWCWARD)  against former foreign minister Bob Carr after he boasted of extensive self-parody in his recent book "I Want My Muesli Now". Writers claim that parody is their business, and that Bob Carr should stick to what he's good at - embarrassing Australia overseas. The comedy writers intend to extend the legal fight, setting in motion a class action against all Australian politicians, with particular reference to the NSW Liberal party, and seeking specific damages from former Premier Barry O'Farrell, Senator Arthur Sinodinos, and PM Mr Tony Abbott. "They're doing us out of a job", said Jeff Browett,  AWCWARD Victorian Branch Assistant Treasurer, who went on to explain: "It's basically a demarcation dispute. We're suing them for restraint of trade, practising comedy without a license, and some other legal and grown-up soundi...

 * Chaos on the set of the second series of MasterBastard tonight causes production shutdown. Reigning champion Tony "Lying Eyes"Abbott knighted two of the camera operators and gave a life peerage to the set designer. New contestant Attorney General George Brandis then called the standby props person a "stinky bum fart weasel" because that's what free speech is all about. Several of the other contestants burst out laughing and were unable to continue. Indignant Floor Manager Bronwyn "Be Bob A Lu Bop" Bishop immediately threw them out of  the studio, saying that this was totally unacceptable behaviour: "We've got people here doing their very best to be complete bastards and all you lot can do is laugh". Further outbursts of infectious laughter turned into disorder. Bishop then evicted the entire camera crew, the boom operator, a make-up person, several talent agents, and a guy called Terry who no-one can figure out what he does but it...