UNIVERSAL REMOTE CONTROL

           If you thought the only thing Aldi was good for was buying up a shitload of cheap chilli-cherry chocolate you are wrong my friend. For only $29.95 I bought a universal remote control that actually works.

Tried it out over the weekend. Set it to Egypt: Mubarak gone. Push of a button.  Brilliant . Okay, back home: Push a button : Get a bunch of emails from everyone I've ever known approving of everything I've ever done. And the Jag XK 140 is on the way. Now if I can just figure out which button gets Shane Warne to shut up on Twitter & which stops Andrew Bolt talking complete bullshit, we're getting somewhere. This is going to be fun. Requests anyone ?


 Today's thought is from Mr Ramshackle McThought of No I've Never Heard Of It Either who says

"Fools rush in where angels check with OH&S and negotiate an equitable hourly rate"

Finally, another entry into our "Satire-is-basically-redundant" file. Ripped from today's headlines ( or rather that bit in the Age's letters-to-Editor section, you know - the "I've just had a brief and demented thought which I shall immediately email to the Age" feature) and I swear to you this is true word-for-word but the name's been withheld by me 'cos I don't want anyone hunting me down and hurting me & no they're not from Beaumaris

'Why is everyone writing about Tony Abbott ? He has done nothing at all to get his name into the papers.'

            ... well look I can't stand around here talking all night. I have to get to my Goddess Belly-dancing & creative financial visualisation seminar. There's a fortune in my belly button. Apparently. If I believe it enough.
That's the secret. Don't tell anyone.........

And people: every day can be a Miles Davis sort of a day. If you want it.

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