WHAT KIND OF FOOL AM I ?




BUZZWHIZQUIZ.COM in association with ALIAS POOR YORICK and Facebook presents "WHICH DEADLY SIN IS REALLY YOU?" 

If you're sick of answering tragically transparent questions in order to find out which 60's folk band you should have been in or which one of Hitler's evil henchmen is really you (I got Goering. Embarrassing) then you may be ready to find out about your defining character defect. There are Seven Deadly Sins. Which one is you?  Press Play to Start

                                           PLAY

1. Seven seems like an arbitrary number for Deadly Sins. Perhaps there should be one more. What do you think should be the Eighth Deadly Sin ?

(a) Knowing the lyrics to the Pina Colada song
(b) Being ambivalent about the use of the Oxford comma
(c) Failing to travel at the correct speed when merging onto a Freeway
(d) Actually seven seems like the right number for Deadly Sins and I've checked this with Satan

2. Which experimental lab animal is you ?

(a) Rat
(b) Mouse
(c) Ferret
(d) Clive Palmer

3. A number of Australian rock bands have been named after road signs or place names spotted while travelling. These include Little River Band, Men at Work, and of course Dragon. Which road sign would be your band's name ?

(a) Rough Surface
(b) Wrong Way: Go Back
(c) Concentrate on Road at All Times. Do Not Be Distracted. Especially By This Sign. 
(d)  Is this even a real quiz ?

4. What's your favourite way to spend a Saturday night ?

(a) Writing angry letters to The Age Travel Guide 
(b) Getting naked, smothering myself with goose fat, and watching episodes of Downton Abbey dubbed into Cantonese & making farting noises whenever Carson enters a scene
(c) Making voodoo dolls of Tony Abbott and his cabinet and giving voodoo doll Joe Hockey really severe wedgies
(d) Plotting my revenge on all of you. 

5. The Head of the World Bank approaches you & says: "We're in terrible trouble. There's stagflation in the emerging Balkan states, Russian oligarchs are holding the Hong Kong Stock Exchange to ransom by manipulating exchange rates between the Yuan Renminbi and the US dollar, and on top of that a cabal of American banks is artificially suppressing interest rates in an attempt to stifle a fresh sub prime loan scandal. We need your advice".  What do you say to him ?

(a) Have you tried meditation
(b) Fuck off. I'm trying to read Proust
(c) You smile kindly and say "You do realise everything you've just said is complete gibberish"
(d) No really, I'm beginning to suspect this isn't a proper quiz.

6. What's your favourite colour ?

(a) Cobalt Blue
(b)  Is wacky a colour ?
(c) The blackish-red of the blood of your ancestors spilled over the the centuries by my Satanic sword
(d) Oh I say, steady on old chap, this is supposed to be a bit of fun

7. This man is .... ?        

(a) The new Senator for the Ice-cream Headache Party
(b) My philosophy tutor at Cambridge back in 1978
(c) Wasted in a black & white shot
(d) A bit dead


8. This is all getting a bit silly, isn't it ?

(a) I am the Eggman, They are the Eggmen
(b) I am the Walrus
(c) Goo goo goo joob


PLEASE WAIT WHILE WE CALCULATE YOUR RESULTS. IF YOU WANTED YOU COULD EVEN PRETEND THERE WAS ONE OF THOSE CIRCLE THINGS MOVING AROUND. WHO INVENTED THAT ANYWAY, DO YOU THINK THEY GET A ROYALTY? OKAY

                   Your deadly sin is.... SLOTH.


Or if you want to get fancy about it,  procrastination.  Because let's face it you've got things you were supposed to be doing, and instead you've been piss-farting about here wasting time with this stupid quiz.  You ought to be ashamed. So go give your child that medication they urgently need, finish writing that speech you're due to give at the United Nations, or just write that ransom demand. You've got a life dammit, get on with it.










Comments

Popular posts from this blog

HOW TO NOT SHOOT TAYLOR SWIFT

LEST WE FORGET © ANZAC 2019 ™ ®

HOW TO GIVE UP SMOKING