SHIT IS FUCKED UP,DUDE

A paid political presentation from the Hipster Douchbag Alliance. ALIAS POOR YORICK does not endorse any opinions or abuses of syntax in this message

Written and spoken by Merkin Dreadlock.

Authorized by Ophelia Occasionally, and DJ Authentyk on behalf of the Hipster Douchebag Alliance.

Dudes. Shit is all fucked up and everything . I blame the military-industrial complex. And politicians. And old people. And teachers. Like I went to school and they just tried to teach me stuff ! They oppressed me with facts.  I've been in the  entertainment industry for ten years and never needed a single fact. Screw you, you fascists. And that's another thing: there's too much hate. Like I really really hate that. I blame the man. And the cops.

So things need to change, right ?

And like when will things ever change. I went on this march about four years ago. March to stop hunger. There's still hunger ! What's with that. I signed an online petition against war. There's still war ! What's with you people ?

If we're elected things will change. For a start we'll be legalising the triple-shot latte.And all the harmless drugs. And there'll be free waistcoats for dudes on the dole.  Suburbia has to go. It's wack. It's like just way too suburban. A friend of mine lives way out in the outer suburbs, and he's like twenty-five kilometres from the nearest art gallery ! That's Dickensian. And there's coffee bars out there that have no Wifi !! How fucked is that ? There's laws. Or there should be. Wait till we get into power. We'll be cool. We won't like exercise that power. That'd be like, authoritarian. We're against that. Totally.

So we need to make shit not fucked up. We'll get rid of fucked up. You'll just be left with shit. Vote for the Hipster-Douchebag Alliance. It makes no sense, but it's cool.

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