FOLK ME DEAD

Winner of our inaugural folk-music lyric competition is Sean-Fergus Resentment of West Buttock with his song:

"F*** the English"....from his acclaimed debut album "GIVE ME WHISKY, OR GIVE ME DEATH, BUT FIRST GIVE ME WHISKEY'

Oh oh come listen to me, and I'll tell you about a pack of bastards.
They stole all our potatoes then. Pack of bastards. English bastards.

And they took me darling sister Maude. You pack of bastards.
And they gave her an unflattering haircut. Pack of bastards. English bastards.

And they took me darling dog called Spot. Pack of bastards.
And they dyed weird colours and patterns into his fur, making him the laughing stock of all the other dogs in the village. Pack of English bastard scum. You bastard pack of English scum.

And they took me darling bother Mick...
And made him represent his country in the Eurovision Song Quest.
He's never been the same since then. You f***ing English bastards.
Hangs round with that Lord of the Dance crowd, and never calls his mother.
You f***king English bastards

You took all our potatoes, and all our money too.
You took away our dignity
 And left us with U2.
You bastard English bastards

You know how much we hate Bono.
You f***ing English bastards.

You buggered me Mum's whole world view,
You bastard English bastards
You introduced her to String Theory and the Multiverse,
When she only wanted Oprah.

You miserable English bastards.

Everything is your fault, you've rooted up the Irish
You introduced us to blank verse & it's just f***ed up everything because nothing scans or rhymes anymore.
You f***ing English bastards

F*** the English  
F*** the English
It's all your fault

(Repeat & fade)

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

HOW TO NOT SHOOT TAYLOR SWIFT

LEST WE FORGET © ANZAC 2019 ™ ®

HOW TO GIVE UP SMOKING