SUMMERTIME (Television) BLUES

Exciting news for discerning viewers as Ch Nine starts up its 9YouEffingLittleBeauty summertime boys-own channel. Yes it's Two & a Half Men 24/7 and in 3D. Pass me the VB, bloke.

But first, our competition winner Mr B. Brecht of Upper Plenty who sent in...

"He who laughs last is most likely to be detained for psychiatric evaluation"

Mr Brecht's entry ties with that of Mr Kurt Weill of Melton who sent in his favourite actual newspaper headline of the year:

LESBIAN SEX FEUD STOPS BRADY BUNCH REUNION


More exciting news for summertime tv viewers. Ch 10 presents:

MasterRaceChef

Ve have ways of making you torte

IMPORTANT EDITORIAL ANNOUNCEMENT:   This truly terrible joke was written by our Editor-at-Large, Mr Paul Yorick and is the sort of thing that could only happen during the holiday season when we are short-staffed and rushed off our feet. It does not necessarily reflect what we laughingly refer to as the editorial policy of this publication. Mr Yorick is legendary for devotion to the bad pun, and is prepared to travel so far for a joke that he has accumulated enough frequent-flier points to purchase a decent size island.

As a disciplinary measure we have demoted Mr Yorick from Editor-at-Large to Editor-at-Medium, where he will be forced to figure out what's happening in the world entirely on the basis of  watching afternoon television. And may Oprah have mercy on his soul.

 ..... MasterRaceChef   .... first lull your baby carrots into a false sense of security with organic fertilizers and the signing of non-aggression pacts, then ....

YES THANK YOU PAUL THAT'LL DO

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